A couple days ago I was approached by someone who struggled with issues of fidelity within his marriage. I ain’t going to lie: this has always been a struggle area for me, and because I’m pretty vocal about it, it was probably one of the reasons he came to me.

One of the reasons faithfulness can be so tricky is because the heart is a wildfire that needs to be checked. Emotions go where emotions go, if you let them, but this leads into my “love is more than a feeling, it’s a choice” rant. However, his issues were more on point, a “temptation of the flesh” as he put it. (As an aside, I love it when people speak like this. It’s such a more spiritual sounding obfuscation for “I’m horny and I’m always trying to push up on women”).

His parting comment as he laid out his dilemma was “I like lobster, but I can’t have lobster every day.”

Marriage is a lifetime commitment. That’s forever for at least one of you. Marriage is a sacrifice of yourself for the sake of another. You surrender your personal rights as you strive to please another. Marriage is risk. There is no guarantee of happiness or fulfillment. You are always vulnerable to heartache or heartbrokenness. No one can hurt you the way, nor as deeply, a spouse can. I have to remind myself, and recommit myself, to one simple fact:

Marriage is work. Marriage is work. Marriage is work.

And you know what? I like chicken. You know what I get? A recipe book for chicken. I can have chicken every day and not have the same meal twice.

And if I get tired of chicken, I abstain chicken for a while. If you don’t eat for a while, you’ll be surprised how soon you start craving chicken. Any chicken. Just a sniff of chicken. Even a taste. Some chicken leftovers. Whatever.

Alright, this column made me hungry.

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