I’ve been wondering why I try to be a good person. As a friend of mine recently pointed out, morality is not the point of religion. I’m no Ayn Rand-ian, but if I remove God from the equation of my life, then the question I’m left asking about existence is “what’s in it for me?”

When I ask “what’s in it for me?” I’m basically outlining what my philosophy of life would be without Christ. I know because I know me and it’s the question I most naturally ask before I remember that life’s not about me. At my core, I’m basically a selfish person. It’s not like I have a fear of breaking laws. It’s not like I have a natural bent towards fidelity or even monogamy.

I’ve called myself a Christian for a long time. Twenty some odd years later, I just now feel like I’m getting the grasp of some of it. Which means that I cringe when I look back at some of my previous stances and beliefs, things I KNEW with absolute CERTAINTY.

It’s one reason why I find it difficult to point to a person’s failings and say “some Christian (Muslim, Buddhist, Wiccan, what have you) they are. They are just another hypocrite.” On one level, that’s true. However, I try to allow the grace of “where would they be if they weren’t trying to pursue their spiritual journey?” Some people are lousy Christians, I say as I look in the mirror. Some people are louse “-ists” of all stripes.

Sure, to some I seem to be pursuing “being good” because of some imaginary guy in the sky tells me to. When all is said and done, I’m little different than them. Pursuing an idea, an ideal, larger than myself – and doing the best I can with as much as I understand.

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